Looking in the mirror

Today I stood in front of my bedroom mirror in my pajamas and took a long hard look at myself. From the neck up I like what I see - the hair on my head is grown in enough to show all over, and my eyebrows are finally filling in. What a difference those eyebrows make! Now when I smile you can see it all over my face.

Next I looked at my chest. To tell you the truth, the flat side looks much nicer than the side with the hill. I forgot how nice it was to be flat chested (I'm not kidding) - no worries about which top will fit or that a bra needs to be worn. (I can't tell you how much I hate bras - they've never fit me correctly and have always caused me to constantly drag up the straps like my 6th grade teacher Miss Fain.)

Right, so I'm still in shock/denial about losing my breast, and I know I can't go around this. As someone important once said - "When you're going through hell, keep going."

Although my cousin Sally had something to offer. She said that when she was in a similar situation she never did get the sad/angry time. She and I have a lot in common, we are both pragmatic people who deal with stuff when it comes up and then move on. I am going to keep my mind and heart open to whatever should be happening. I will find a good therapist and process what has happened and will happen.

I just must keep ahold of the concept that everyone deals with this differently.

Today I am spending the whole day and evening with Heshy - Marshall's day will be 16 hours long as it is the last day to file taxes and he works for one of those franchises like H&R Block. After this week he'll be back home cooking his heart out for awhile.

Heshy and I are going to Lake Chabot for a hike. (Maybe with the dog.) Then the dog will get a much-needed bath and flea medicine. Our friend Susan will be bringing dinner, and I will be delivering it to Marshall at work (1/2 mile away).

They say it will be sunny all week. Pray for sun.