My ears

I never much noticed my ears before today. As I see my reflection in the screen of my laptop I realize that my ears stick out. Not a pretty picture. It's upsetting knowing that being out and about without a hat while my hair is almost gone will bother others, especially children. Last night I stopped by to give food to Edward, Ginna and Isaac in their new place (moving in the rain sucks) and little Isaac didn't even recognize me. boo hoo

I am thirsty all the time, but maybe I'm just suffering from dry mouth and not really thirsty. It's kinda frustrating, since I can never seem to get enough to make my mouth wet for more than a moment.

Nothing in my body is working the way it used to. I could always count on being warm in any weather, I am now almost always cold, even in a hot shower. I used to be able to eat whatever I wanted with no ill effects (other than 'stinky noises') and now certain foods just don't agree with me. My skin stays dry no matter what lotion I use, rye toast causes sores in my mouth, arrgh.

All that said, I feel kinda OK. I was able to work in Mill Valley for a few hours today, but lacked the energy to drive to San Rafael and visit Lisa. I finally got my personal stationery order and wrote a few thank you notes (thanks, Mom, for teaching me to do that), but now I feel like I could veg all afternoon and evening with no trouble at all.

This just isn't like me. Yes, I understand that my body is going through an enormously stressful process, but I'm not the kind of person to sit and sit and sit. And I don't care much for TV, either. Thank goodness for the internet.

Bored, slightly anxious ('I've got a pill for that'), annoyed at all that needs doing but which I can't do.

On the other hand, and G-d knows for me there always is another hand, I'm 25% through the chemo, my kids are having their needs met, I'm not terribly uncomfortable at the moment, and I'm awash in good wishes and kind prayers. What the hell am I complaining about?

Pray for continued good health.